Sunday, May 25, 2014

Keeping a Loved One's Memory Alive

My dad died before my children were born.  It was a tremendous loss, but even more present with the birth of each child.  I wanted to keep my dad's memory alive in the everyday lives of my children.

From the day they were born, my dad was present in their lives.  We brought a picture of my dad into the delivery room, so that my dad was present for their births.  This was so helpful to me.  I felt like he was still here with me. 

We kept the memories of "Granddaddy" alive through everyday conversation.  We told specific stories about "Granddaddy" and also brought his presence into every day scenarios.  My husband and I comment on how much Granddaddy would have loved snuggling with them while watching "Cars", or how he would have shared his homegrown tomatoes with each of the kids.

One of the most effective ways that we keep my dad's spirit with us is by creating a book all about Granddaddy.  I printed out old pictures of my dad and added little vignettes about him and his life.

My kids talk about Granddaddy like they know him.  He is present in their lives. 

You would change your approach, depending on your religion, but this book really helped us discuss heaven, religion, and death.

This is just one little way to help keep your loved one's memory alive in the lives of your children.  It has made a huge difference in my life.  I still miss my dad every day, but it is a wonderful thing to hear my children discussing him, as if he were in the next room...
 
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10 comments:

  1. That is the loveliest thing, Laura! I'm in the same position with losing my mom many years ago before both of my kids were born and I wish I'd thought of this idea. Beautiful.
    Susanna
    Whimsy Workshop Teaching

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    1. Thank you so much, Susanna! I still smile when my kids talk about my dad, as if they know him. In a way, they do. He is still so alive in the hearts of my family. Thank you for sharing with me about your mom. It is amazing how they are still so present, even when they have been gone so long.
      Laura

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  2. Laura, this post is just beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it. It's wonderful to hear how you are keeping the memories of your dad alive for your children.

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    1. Thanks so much, Tammy! You brought happy tears to my eyes :)
      Laura

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  3. Laura, funny, but George just said the other day hope he misses your dad and his thoughtful insight on things. What a blessing he was in SO MANY LIVES! This is a wonderful way to bless your children's lives with his love...

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    1. Donna, that is funny. It is true that he remains alive in our hearts. I feel him here in so many ways. Visiting the lake is so bittersweet. I feel him there more than anywhere else, but I also feel the loss the most. What I love most is that my kids "know" what he was like. Thanks for letting me know that you guys are thinking of him!
      Laura

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  4. I loved reading this post. It made me cry…I lost my dad when I was young and wish every day that my little girl could know him. I love this idea so much, thank you so much for sharing. I hope to do something like this with my daughter.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing this with me. I hope that you can do something special for your own daughter. I believe it helps heal us, as much as it enriches their lives. Thanks again, for letting me know. It really means a lot to me.
      Laura

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  5. Beautiful and I'm sure the sun shines brighter each day you read that with your children!

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